10 Choosing Tips
Matching Toys with Temperaments
Taming Toy Tantrums
Toy Safety
The Joy of Toys

In selecting the right toy for your child ask yourselves:

1. What will it teach my child?
2. Will it hold my child's attention?
3. Is it safe?
4. Is it annoying for me to see or hear?
5. Does it promote creativity, social interaction?
6. Is it non-combative, non-aggressive?
7. Does it foster hand-eye coordination and problem-solving skills?
8. Can it be enjoyed by both genders?
9. How many senses does it stimulate?
10. Will I enjoy playing with this toy?

So many toys, so little time. Play is children's work, and toys are their tools. From a baby's first attempts to grab a rattle to a teen's mastery of the intricacies of a computer game, children learn reasoning, concentration, and motor, social, and language skills from toys. Toys can enhance curiosity and teach a child to make wise choices.

The best toys are the ones that stimulate many senses and that give a child the opportunity to make things happen. Babies take a swipe at the ball placed on the floor in front of them and discover that not only does it roll away, it makes music! They're motivated to stretch and reach and make it happen again. Blocks piled one on top of each other makes a tower toddlers can be proud of. They also enjoy the fun of knocking it down and starting over again. Toys that promote creativity in play will be enjoyed for many years to come.

When selecting toys for a child, think carefully about the toy and the child. Choose toys that are developmentally appropriate, that build on skills the child already has and provide a few challenges. What does your child enjoy playing right now? Give her the tools—the toys—that will help her do it better.

Choose toys that can be shared with friends as well as enjoyed alone. Give toys that you will enjoy playing with, and then take time to play with your child. You'll learn more about how your child thinks and feels by getting on the floor and playing with her. These memories will last a lifetime. Remember, you are the best "toy" your child could ever have.

It's fascinating how even children in the same family are so different from one another. A child's individual personality is determined, at least in part, by their inborn temperament, which begins to reveal its self soon after birth. One three-month-old baby may be described as "laid-back," while another three- month-old may need to be constantly entertained. Your job as a parent is to help your child become the best he or she can be. This means nurturing your child in a way that shapes his or her nature to the child's advantage. The toys you select for your child can help you do this. A shy child might benefit from toys that require interaction with other people—games that use the thinking skills she excels in but that are played with a partner. A very active or aggressive child probably should not have an assortment of toy weapons at his disposal. Instead, think sports equipment or skates or balls—toys that channel energy away from violent play. If you feel that an aggressive child needs to learn more about caring for others, your first thought may be to give that child a baby doll or a teddy bear. But will he play with it? Instead try toys that encourage caregiving activities on a heroic scale—equipment to play police officer (minus the gun) or fire fighter.

Avoid the trap of selecting toys for the child you wish you had as a child. If you're using toys to stretch a child in a new direction, think small steps. Giving a doll-loving little girl a tool set probably won't turn her into a construction expert, but building a dollhouse together might be the first step toward a career in architecture.

Playgroups for toddlers and preschoolers can rapidly disintegrate into tantrums over toys. A lot of kids and toys in a small room is a recipe for disaster. Why is it so difficult for children to share?

The ability to share is not a measure of a child's generosity. It's a developmental skill, part of mastering the social complexities of cooperative play. Two-year-olds, three-year-olds, and even four-year-olds prefer parallel play, when children play side by side, but each does his or her own thing. Two- year-olds who are just learning the meaning and power of the word "Mine!" can't be expected to understand the concept of sharing. Three-year-olds may not yet be able to understand that playing together requires give as well as take.

Providing some structure makes it easier for children to share. If they can't play with a toy cooperatively, introduce the idea of taking turns. Use a timer to minimize arguments. Before a friend comes over to play, talk to your child about which toys will be shared. Put away special toys that your child might not want to share. If certain toys inevitably cause arguments, put those away, too.

Sharing doesn't mean your child has to be a doormat when others demand to use things that are hers. Teach your child to speak up for herself and to come to you for assistance when toy arrangements don't seem fair. If you respect your child's "toy rights," it will be easier for your child to learn to respect the property of others.

10 TIPS FOR CHOOSING SAFE TOYS

1. Inspect toys frequently for sharp edges, splinters, or removable and chokable parts. Safe toys may become unsafe through wear and tear.

2. Avoid toys with dangling strings longer than eight inches.

3. Keep unsafe toys, such as balloons, beads, or chokable blocks out of reach of young children who tend to mouthe objects.

4. Do not allow other children to use loud toys, such as cap guns, around babies, since they may damage hearing.

5. Match the toy with the temperament. If your child is a thrower, get soft cloth or foam toys.

6. Remove dangling crib goys once baby is old enough to push up on his hands and knees.

7. Before buying a toy, bend it a bit to see how breakable the plastic is. Be careful, plastic toys are thin, brittle, and likely to break easily, leaving sharp or jagged edges, such as airplane wings.

8. Avoid letting babies and toddlers play with uninflated balloons, or those that have popped, which can cause choking. Always supervise play with an inflated balloon.

9. Throw away suffocation-causing plastic wrapping as quickly as possible when unpacking toys.

10. Store toys properly. Avoid toy chests with attached lids that can fall on a child and cause injury and strangulation. Toy shelves are much safer and teach the developing child a sense of order.

Toy safety has a double concern – the safety of the toy itself: no sharp edges, no toxic paint, and no little pieces that can fall off; and become a choking hazard. There's also the issue of how a toy is played with and what actually happens to it in your household.

Information on toy packaging will tell you a lot about toy safety. When the label says that a toy is not recommended for children under three, safety is the reason. The toy may have small parts or strings and cords that can cause choking or strangulation. Labels will also warn you if a toy marketed for older children may be hazardous to a younger child. When big brother's toy has lots of little parts, parents must pay special attention so that baby sister doesn't put those pieces in her mouth. Labels will also warn parents about appropriate age groups for toys that require electricity or for toys, such as chemistry sets, that have other dangers.

Parents should be aware of how their children play with their toys. Toys and mobiles suspended over a crib are fine for newborns, but can become dangerous when a baby starts to pull up onto his hands and knees (around five months of age), since baby can get dangerously tangled in the toy. To avoid injuries, children need guidance in playing with toys that are thrown, such as airplanes. New toys often require new rules and close supervision.

Check your children's toys periodically for safety. Make sure there are no sharp edges from parts breaking off. Repair toys promptly or throw them away before someone gets hurt.

One of the pleasures of being a parent is being a "big kid." You get to revisit some of your old favorites and play with cool new stuff that wasn't around when you were a child. Children and their toys can remind us that life is at its best when we take time to relax, use our imaginations, and just have fun.

Whether you're learning from your child about the very latest in trendy fashion dolls or enjoying a building session with good old-fashioned wooden blocks, toys can help you share your child's world. Being able to see things from your child's viewpoint is the foundation of good parenting decisions. Careful observation of your child's play will help you discover how your child learns best, how he or she feels about friends and family; even give you hints about what the future holds.

Whether your toy budget is big or small, enjoying toys with your child will help you spend it wisely. More important than the cost of a toy is the time you take to create wonderful memories of time spent together. Use toys to help build connections with your children, rather than to get them out of your hair. It's people that make toys special.